🌋The Volcano

When your emotional expressions were consistently dismissed or punished in childhood, you learned to become a master of emotional self-control. You developed incredible ability to read subtle cues about when your feelings were welcome or unwelcome. This taught you exceptional patience and perseverance, making you incredibly considerate of others' emotional capacity and skilled at creating safe spaces for people to express themselves. But your nervous system never learned that your feelings could exist at a steady, consistent volume rather than requiring dramatic amplification to be heard. You find yourself automatically minimizing your emotions to avoid being a burden and then exploding in theatrical displays when the pressure becomes unbearable—this strategy is a result of a childhood where steady emotional expression was not an option 🎭. This leaves your partner astounded: "You were a paragon of stoicism. And now a blow-up! What gives?"