🎭30-Question Conditional Love Childhood Trauma Quiz

Growing up, you were assigned a role before you knew yourself—scapegoat, golden child, lost child, or caretaker—and forced to give up being a normal kid to fit into your family's chaos.

As a child, you never knew what mood your parent would be in—loving one moment, distant or angry the next.

As a child, you never knew which version of your parent you'd get—their moods, rules, and availability changed without warning or explanation.

You never knew which version of your parent you'd get—loving one moment, cruel the next, creating chronic hypervigilance about their mood.

When you were little, you either stayed quiet during conflicts or exploded dramatically.

There was no real physical intimacy between parents in your house—people just played their part.

You witnessed how hurtful people could be and vowed never to be like them.

You were often unfairly treated by your parents or siblings—like all problems were your fault.

Throughout childhood, love came with invisible strings—affection was given only when you played your role perfectly: therapist, cheerleader, or emotional caretaker.

Growing up, love felt like a lottery—some days you were cherished, others ignored or punished seemingly for the same behavior.

You became the family's designated problem—blamed for everything that went wrong, absorbing their dysfunction as if it were your fault.

Growing up, your parents' love depended on their mood—forcing you to constantly earn even basic attention that should have been freely given.

In your home, adults never admitted responsibility—they blamed, deflected, counter-attacked or raged instead.

In your family, love required chasing—parents withheld affection until you proved yourself, or only showed care during a crisis.

In your household, love came with screaming matches, tearful apologies, slammed doors, and passionate makeups.

As a child, you stayed loyal to people who hurt you—because they were your family.

You only knew how to love in extremes—either too close or too distant.

As a child, you saw that fighting back was necessary to avoid being hurt.

Love came with strings attached from the people who were supposed to care for you unconditionally.

You learned early that keeping everyone else happy was more important than what you wanted.

Growing up, you automatically put aside your own needs whenever someone else seemed upset or uncomfortable.

You hated your family's patterns, but feared you'd become just like them anyway.

You kept hoping your family would change, but they never did.

You learned that love was a reward for performance, not a birthright.

You were told you were 'too needy' or 'demanding' when you asked for things directly.

You had to compete with your siblings for limited attention/resources.

Your parents would often say 'no' out of habit or discipline - the real answer came much later because you made it a point to stand up for yourself.

Sometimes you'd just shut down and space out—unable to fight or flee, like a deer in the headlights.

Direct requests were seen as disrespectful or inappropriate in your household.

Growing up you learned to like those who like you, ignore those who ignore you and fight those who punished or attacked you.